May the 4th Be with You

This post contains spoilers for The Rise of Skywalker! Proceed at your own risk.

I don’t have a first memory of Star Wars. I don’t know who introduced the movies to my brother and me – possibly the neighbor boys or our church friends. My parents had seen the movies, but they weren’t huge fans, so I don’t think it was them. And yet, I cannot remember life without it.

I don’t even remember what sort of impact the movies had on me as a child. I’ve heard so many stories of people who say Luke was their hero or that Leia was their role model growing. I don’t even remember really having a favorite character!

But, I remember playing Star Wars, my brother as the Jedi Master, myself as the rebellious Padawan. I remember talking about it for hours as we looked at the picture books. I remember wanting the Death Star LEGO set. I remember lightsaber fights in backyards and being ganged up on because I was the only girl.

Then my brother and I grew up. We still enjoyed the movies, but we outgrew our lightsabers and LEGOs.

Why, you stuck-up, half-witted, scruffy-looking nerf herder!

The Force Awakens was the first Star Wars movie I saw in theaters. And it – pun most definitely intended – (re)awakened my love for this franchise. Rey, Finn, Poe, Rose, BB-8, and Kylo Ren/Ben Solo are all characters to whom I became desperately attached. I started watching Star Wars Theory videos with my brother. The Last Jedi cemented my status as a Reylo (thank you Rian Johnson), and I’d go down Pinterest rabbit holes pinning all the Reylo theories. I’m watching The Clone Wars now. After The Rise of Skywalker, I listened to podcasts dissecting it. I got the novelizations for my birthday. When I say the sequels revived my love, I mean it revived it.

"Something inside me has always been there. But now it's awake."

I don’t know the original trilogy without the prequels. I was only seven when Revenge of the Sith was released in 2005, so I wasn’t old enough to be aware of the hate and criticism they originally received. I never understood the hate; I still love the prequels despite its cringy-ness and Jar Jar Binks (whom I find endearing). In any case, the prequel memes are great. The sequel trilogy arrived with its own drama and division within the Star Wars fandom. I’m almost too painfully aware of it now. I love the franchise, but it can have one of the most toxic fanbases out there. I’m not sure why, and I don’t have a solution for this problem.

I could discuss the issues within the fandom at length, and it needs to be discussed. But that’s not what I want to focus on. Today, I want to celebrate what Star Wars means to me.

Star Wars has always been about hope. It’s the most ridiculous space opera about one family’s drama ruining an entire galaxy, but it all comes back to hope. Hope that the good will win, hope in our friends and family, hope in the good around us. Star Wars is also about compassion. Compassion that can lead to redemption, such as Darth Vader’s and Kylo Ren’s. Redemption is the point in Star Wars. It’s more than just a fight between the light side and the dark side of the Force. The mysticism in these movies is one of my favorites!

I love the adventure in Star Wars. Why wouldn’t you want to watch a movie about space wizards running around with laser swords? Or bounty hunters and smugglers with cool ships? Cute droids and weird creatures? Amazing fashion choices?? Sign me up!

Compassion, which I would define as...unconditional love...is essential to a Jedi’s life. So, you might say that we are encouraged to love.

I also love all the characters. There’s really not one character that I don’t love (or love to hate *cough cough* Emperor Palpatine). Anakin’s journey to Darth Vader is so tragic. And oh, Obi-Wan – I love him so much. Padme is simply amazing. Leia, Luke, and Han are, of course, as classic as classic can get. Don’t even get me started on how much I adore R2-D2, C3PO, Chewie, and BB-8. Star Wars also has some great villains: Darth Vader, Darth Maul, Count Dooku, General Grievous.

And then there’s our new characters. I don’t think I love any of them as much as I do Rey and Kylo Ren/Ben Solo. There’s something about Rey that just resonates with me (and it’s more than her being the Type Nine example in Star Wars characters as the Enneagram posts… maybe…). Her compassion, her strength, her search for meaning, and her anger speaks to me. And Kylo Ren. Ben Solo. His character is so fascinating and so tragic. I’ve already said that I’m a Reylo and I could speak at length about it, but I will restrain myself at the moment. (I’m planning to write an actual academic essay about them for fun, so yeah.)

You’re not alone. Neither are you.

For some in the fandom, especially in light of The Rise of Skywalker, these reasons have been shattered. Some days, I feel that way, too. It’s terribly upsetting. I was too overwhelmed the first time I saw it – all I could remember was that Ben and Rey kissed!!! I was shocked. After a second viewing and further thought, I see the plot holes. There are so many things that make me roll my eyes – Palpatine’s return, the fetch-quest nature of the movie, Rey being a Palpatine, ‘Rey Sykwalker.’ I’m so angry over Ben Solo’s death. He! Deserved! Better!

My friends and I had different reactions to The Rise of Skywalker.

Hearing stories about how other people and their children have reacted to The Rise of Skywalker and Ben’s death breaks my heart. It makes me want to have a lengthy conversation with JJ Abrams and Lucasfilm. Truth be told, from a storytelling and marketing point of view, it doesn’t make sense. But that’s not the point of this blog post.

All this reminds me that the stories we tell are powerful. They hold meaning upon creation, but they take on new meanings once in the hands of its audience. I know this means leaves it open to literally millions of interpretations. Some will be more on the mark than others. However, what I love about stories is that they live on in our own imaginations.

And yes, what happened in the movies is technically canon and cannot change unless the powers that be say otherwise. But I’m off living my own version of these stories. Rey and Ben’s story doesn’t have to end there. It won’t for me. Heck, Anakin and Obi-Wan’s stories haven’t ended yet.

That’s what I’m celebrating this Star Wars Day.

May the force be with you.

#StarWars #Maythe4thBeWithYou #Fandom #PopCulture

A Year of Increase: Quarter One Review

Somehow, we’re already four months into 2020. This year – though not going how anybody thought it would – is flying by. Regardless of the current events, I want to keep working towards my 2020 goals. I started doing a quarterly review of my goals last year, inspired by one of my favorite bullet journalists. It helped me stay on track, and it makes it easier to reflect on my final progress at the end of the year, too! In a quarterly review, I assess what was and wasn’t working, how life circumstances affected my goat-getting, and what steps I should take next. I wasn’t perfect at reviewing quarterly, but this year I decided to try it again.

The four goals that I shared with you are:

1. Wellness: replace chemical products with natural ones (as I can afford it)

2. Spiritual: finish The Chronological Bible plan

3. Creative: read 20 books

4. Personal: pass the B2 level for German fluency on Deutsche Welle

Wellness

If you’d like a more detailed explanation of why I chose what I did, check out this blog post

I had switched out my body wash at school with one from Love, Beauty, & Planet. I can't remember the name, but I loved the smell – it even lingered on me the morning after my night shower! I also started some research on natural shampoos. I decided on what I’m looking for in a natural shampoo: lathering, as zero waste as possible, and the after-wash feel. I bought a shampoo bar from Lush called Jason and the Argon Oil, and I’m excited to try it once I finish my bottle of Suave. I'll be sure to let you know what I think! During quarantine, I've also been experimenting with extending my hair washes. I've gone up to 5 days! This will extend the life of my shampoo and conditioner. I also bought my favorite Lush bar soap, Figs and Leaves.

Spiritual

My consistency with the reading plan varied often, but I’m trying not to be so hard on myself when I get behind. While it’s nice to stay on track, that’s not the point. The point is to gain a greater understanding of God’s Word. I’ve been enjoying using both the NKJV and AMPC translations, and I’ve also watched the Bible Project videos on each book I’ve read. I also try to read over my notes every so often, so that I can remember what I’ve read and learned.

Creative

I’ve read five books! That’s already a quarter into my goal, so I am well on track, even a little ahead. I reread the Legend trilogy (Legend, Prodigy, and Champion) by Marie Lu and read Illuminae by Amie Kaufman and Jay Kristoff and The Force Awakens by Alan Dean Foster. I’ve written mini reviews for each book on my Goodreads! In quarter two, I want to read at least one non-fiction book.

I've read 5/20 books for this year's reading challenge!

Personal

I took the Deutsche Welle B2 test at least twice, but I only recorded my second score. I got an 68%, so I definitely have some work to do. There were some skills I know that I know, but I'm just out of practice. I want to get at least a 90% before moving on. Once the semester ends, I will create a language learning routine for myself.

Despite how this year has gone so far, I am satisfied with my progress with these goals. These are just a few of the goals I’ve set for myself to increase my knowledge, passion, and growth in these areas of my life.

How are you doing with your goals? Are you making progress or need to reassess? Let me know in the comments!

#GoalSetting #2020Goals #QuarterlyReview #SRKThoughts